Last night, I was having a headache... something that i have been having quite frequently this few days. Maybe you can say its stress? Or some may call it inability to to handle and perform. On the whole, it just means that Guowei! YOU FAILED!! Its a pretty loud comment. Hey, your designs cannot make it, change here, change here,change here AND here!! 

I think this is probably how I spent this week, going through a lot of different blogs, looking for inspiration. And changing and adding as much things I thought is good for the company blog. But I realize that no matter what I add or change, it can never be compared to the senior web developer coming in. In just one day, he manage to change all the things that I have done in this one week. He has added all the images and changed all the colors and stuff. Mhm. Looking at it, i think I am really not cut out to do designing. Heng I am going to some engine stuff where numbers is all that matters. But well, ya, the thought that I failed still came across my mind quite a few times and it never fail to hit me when I am feeling sad and sian bout all that is happening in my life. Then, i feel so much worst. And there are times when i need to see faces, at work, at home, everywhere. And I know that i cannot be selfish, they are innocent and I should not be showing them faces that I got from work. But things are always like that?? Life is just full of all this ba. 

And i was just reminded of the song 'From The Inside Out'....

A thousand times I've failed 

Still your mercy remains 

And should I stumble again 

Still I'm caught in your grace  

Everlasting, Your light will shine when all else fades 

Never ending, Your glory goes beyond all fame 

my heart and my soul, Lord

 I give you control 

Consume me from the inside out Lord 

Let justice and praise 

become my embrace 

To love You from the inside out  

Your will above all else, 

my purpose remains 

The art of losing myself 

in bringing you praise  

Everlasting, 

Your light will shine when all else fades 

Never ending, Your glory goes beyond all fame 

In my heart, in my soul, Lord 

I give you control

 Consume me from the inside out Lord 

Let justice and praise become my embrace 

To love You from the inside out  

Chorus 2x 

Everlasting,

 Your light will shine when all else fades 

Never ending, Your glory goes beyond all fame 

And the cry of my heart is to bring You praise 

From the inside out Lord, my soul cries out

Indeed, a thousand times i failed. So God, after i failed so many times, God I pray that you hold me up in your hands. God don let me fall so badly that i cannot take it. And God, make me successful! God let me have a good family! and God bless my home! Let your peace reign!! and God, bless this time of working too! God, I also pray that you open up my eyes and see. Let me be more decisive and know what i want. God i leave all my baggages down at your cross. God come and take it away! and i commit my relationship with my frenz to you. God bless those i love and make them what you dreamed them to be. God bless my future girlfriend that she is the one for me and i be the one for her! And God, bless the company that i am working at that the finances will come in! God let there be more business opportunity! and more income! so, God thank you! In Jesus name i pray! Amen!